I started a little conversation on Twitter that seems worth exploring a bit. First off, let me explain that I spent several years as a SAHM, I did a little "work thing" on the side, maybe three hours a week just to make a teensy bit of money and get me out of the house now and again. But mostly, I was invisible.
If you've been there, you know what I mean. For the most part, I loved taking my kids places and doing things with them and just being with them, but I felt marginalized by society. It was as though walking around with a stroller indicated I had no brain, no voice in the larger world.
Until I started a blog.
But honestly, it was not until my first BlogHer conference in 2007, over 1.5 years after I started my blog, that I became aware of the larger conversation that is the mom-o-sphere, that I became a part of it.
And then after BlogHer, I eagerly popped over to read what new blogfriends had to say. I recall reading how Mom A enjoyed dinner with say Jane, and Jonelle and Josephine. And I'd think "But I was sitting right next to Josephine and she didn't mention me."
I remembered having a long talk with, say, Jenny, but not finding my name among the dozen or so bloggers she was so excited to meet IRL.
I was crushed.
I felt hurt and left out.
I felt invisible again.
And no doubt there is at least one mom, likely dozens, maybe hundreds, reading the Blissdom round-ups feeling the same thing right now.
We want to be recognized. We want to be validated. We want to know we matter. We want to feel a part of this fabulous community.
But oftentimes these round-up posts are hastily written after several exciting, but near sleepless nights. Sometimes it takes weeks (uh, years in my case) to sort through the large pile of biz cards we collect at conferences. Sometimes cards fall out of our neat little stack. People get left out despite our best intentions.
My advice to you: hold your head high, comment on the posts of people you met, link to them on your blog even if they didn't give you a shout-out. Continue to put your best foot forward on your blog. And then blast some Rocky theme music or a song like "I will survive" and do jumping jacks until that negative energy is out of your system.
On a related note, great post by Liz over at Mom-101 today on the truth about the mommy wars.